Monthly BroadCast 2015 ( 2nd Quarter)

April 2015

The goal post in soccer is fixed before a match so all players are aligned on how to achieve success, whether as an attacker, in the midfield or in defence. Before 2015, most of us also set goals on areas we wanted to achieve success - spiritually, financially, with our health, in our relationships or career.

This new quarter is a good time to review them. To reset reminders if necessary that would help us achieve them. For those who haven't it's never too late to have something to look forward to. I was challenged to see how much work I still have to put in some areas but excited at the ones I can cross out. 

Also, if you had a promise from God for the year, now is the time to take out your note and read it again. For encouragement and for hope, that so much still lies ahead in 2015.

Have an Awesome April
@FolaFayo

May 2015

It is true many of us know that to be more productive, we need to identify and note down our goals. To even break them into to do's and also to prioritize them.

However there are times when resources especially the 24hours (or 18hours of "awake-time") aren't enough to cover those daily priorities. I was there again recently, but with the help of my hubby was reminded to schedule the priorities.

When you get around this, you discover how much more important some to do's are. You can actually cross out a few completely, and eventually become less stressed covering them with available resources.

May your May be impactful

Fondly
@FolaFayo

June 2015..oops! this was one extremely busy month for me and my family and I was unable to share anything. 

Gratefully I recovered in Q3...watch this space!

Treasures from DLA

Sometime in March this year I was opportune to attend the Daystar Leadership Academy (DLA). It was the Basic Leadership Class. I had a fulfilling experience I must confess. Firstly, I had always wanted to do this, so having it ticked off my goal list was very satisfying and secondly because of the knowledge gained and the enriching networking opportunities.

As fulfilling as it was, it was a stretch program. There were rules to be followed, tests to be written and most especially mindsets to be changed. It took me incorporating early attendance (which was mandatory) with my regular morning school runs. We were taken on courses like Personal Transformation, Success Habits, Excellence Oriented Organization, Organisational Growth, Project Management, Systems Development, Family Success, Delegation Strategies amongst others.

An article on FOOTSTEPS would not be adequate to do justice to all I’ve learnt, but I would share some key ones in this post. I also encourage as many as can attend this Leadership/Management Program to do as well or any other recommended ones. If not for the certificate, it would be an opportunity to gather so much knowledge in a short time on leading people or an organization.

The first lesson that dawned on me at the beginning of the program was the essence of leadership. I learnt that there are many misconceptions about it which has somewhat resulted in the abuse of it over time and in many settings, from homes to organizations and the government.

It is not about titles, but about the tasks performed
It is not about status, but about service
It is not about consumption, but about contribution
It is not about cohesion, but ensuring cooperation
It is not about intimidation, but about inspiration
It is not about manipulation, but about motivation
It is not about lording over people, but loving people
It is not about being a celebrity, but a role of responsibility

In other words, if you are performing relevant/key tasks, serving sincerely, contributing valuably, enhancing cooperation in a team and inspiring or motivating some person other than yourself, if you never knew it before, you have been leading. I for one, used to think (while I worked) that since the organization’s organogram didn’t place me in a “specific - titled” role, then I wasn’t being challenged to develop my leadership potentials and couldn’t give so much as a leader. However, I discovered that in the capacity with which I had somewhat influenced individuals, junior colleagues, peers and teams towards the achievement of a goal, I had served as a leader.

Another lesson I took away from the program, is that SUCCESS IS WHO YOU ARE. In essence, your nature determines the success that can be achieved. It is not merely in the doing but in being. That is why sometimes we see some people whose status or achievement we covet, and the first thing we try to do to succeed like they have is just copy exactly what they do. This often leads to frustration in the long term because we are somewhat working against our nature.

To do something you have never done before, you must become someone you have never being before. The first point of call is changing or developing your person, and then the doing will automatically follow. More often than not, your person is tied to your mindsets; for the journey from grass to grace is an Internal Trip. The challenge here is to so work on your inside, challenge and correct those wrong or limiting mindsets, discover truths, develop your mind, that your outside would be struggling to catch up with it. Even if the outside isn’t changing in the short term, in good time, it will align.

The last but definitely not the least of all my take-aways is the bit on Self Improvement under the Success Habit Course. I am a freak, fanatic, stickler (what other vocabulary is there?) for personal development. I believe in becoming a better you and not settling for the status quo, challenging yourself continually. So it was quite interesting to learn more on this. One of the major activities on self improvement is reading /studying. Earl Nightingale said many years ago that “one hour per day of study in your chosen field was all it takes. One hour per day of study will put you at the top of your field within three years. Within five years you’ll be a national authority. In seven years, you can be one of the best people in the world at what you do”. The tasks with this are to identify that area you want to be good at and then develop the staying power to keep at it. I study an average of 7hours/week now, but on different interests. However, I intend to pick my area of passion and make sure, I top up on it regularly.

On a final note, to gather information is great, but to do with what-you-know is greater. I have tried to instill a practice of noting down action points from every book I read and training program I attend. The fewer they are the better and with deadlines. That way I can experience immediate value from a learning. I encourage you on this, as well as the pearls I have shared. On our own we may not be able, but definitely with God we can.

Stretch

Saturday 30^th October, 2010 - Up by 2 am, worked in the studio till about 7am when I took a break for breakfast and a nap before getting into the regular Saturday routine.

Sunday 31^st October 2010 - Up by 5am, worked in the studio till about 9am then I took a break to get ready for Church with the family and the rest of the regular Sunday schedule.

Monday 1^st November 2010 – Up by 1am, worked till 4am, took a short nap before starting the week.

And on and on, a peep into my diary in recent times. Even today, I worked from 3am till day break. Stretching, to meet deadline, to perfect my skill, to be better at what I do.

Thinking back though, for the first few weeks after leaving paid employment, I felt one of the things I needed to enjoy was a little more rest, like a nap in the afternoon or longer hours at night. But then I pondered on the routine of some popular/successful people.

Tiger woods

6:00 Weight workout (90 minutes)

7:30 Breakfast ; 8:00 Practice tee (2 hours); 10:00 Putting green

10:30 Play 9 holes; 12:00 Lunch; 1:00 Practice tee (2 hours)

3:00 Short game work; 4:00 Play 9 holes; 5:00 Putting green

5:30 Home

Even though he has played since he was two years old and has a very unique gift for the sport of golf, Tiger focuses on a detailed (and deliberate) practice routine each and every day. Deliberate practice makes Tiger a great golfer. (CrossHairs Trader)

Martha Stewart

Martha Stewart rises before the sun, well-rested and ultra-perky at 3:30 am. But, the fact is that no one has ever seen Martha Stewart sleep ... (Martha Stewart Everyway)

President Obama

He reads several papers, eats breakfast with his family and helps pack his daughters, Malia, 10, and Sasha, 7, off to school before making the 30-second commute downstairs — a definite perk for a man trying to balance work and family life. He eats dinner with his family, then often returns to work; aides have seen him in the Oval Office as late as 10 p.m., reading briefing papers for the next day. (New York Times, January 2009)

John Grisham

When he first started writing, Grisham says, he had "these little rituals that were silly and brutal but very important."

"The alarm clock would go off at 5, and I'd jump in the shower. My office was 5 minutes away. And I had to be at my desk, at my office, with the first cup of coffee, a legal pad and write the first word at 5:30, five days a week."

His goal: to write a page every day. Sometimes that would take 10 minutes, sometimes an hour; ofttimes he would write for two hours before he had to turn to his job as a lawyer, which he never especially enjoyed. In the Mississippi Legislature, there were "enormous amounts of wasted time" that would give him the opportunity to write.

"So I was very disciplined about it," he says… (San Francisco Chronicle, Februay 2008)

What we see usually is the result of their stretches. I have learnt that what got them there and keeps them there is a lifestyle of consistency in giving more than what is common.

It didn’t take time for it to dawn on me that, if I also wanted to be different, then I couldn’t continue to do what the regular person did. I needed to stretch. Truth is, I need to put in extra to get into the extra-ordinary. I would only get out of life what others who sleep and wake at the common time get.

How spot on the words of this quote – The Heights by great men reached and kept were not attained in a sudden flight, but they while their companions slept, were toiling upwards in the night - It regularly filled my mind when I was tempted to become laissez faire with my routine.

So now I stretch. For others it may take another format, but definitely to master that skill or ability, you need to give it more- maybe time, maybe attention. You may need to study more, make more cold calls for that sale or even practice more.

Looking t the end goal usually helps to stay on track with stretching. Even the Bible says…for the joy set before Him, He endured the cross (referring to Jesus Christ).

Remember you can’t get what others are not getting if you give just what they are giving. Keep that target in mind, then ssstttrrreeetttccchhh.

Life – A Relay Race

Right now, my mind is jam-packed with recent learnings which I intend to sort out gradually and share, so I have decided to post this learning from my archive. It helped me in making certain resolve.

Sometime ago, I observed and heard the stories of those who passed on and the effect on their immediate family. And it gave me concern.

At the time this thought flooded my mind, I wondered majorly about the financial challenge that may come with the passing away of the parent on the young ones. Worse still if were both parents at the same time. Would there have been enough in place for the children to survive and live on, especially with the standard they enjoyed in the lifetime of their parent? Would there have been someone mandated with the responsibility to administer these funds, if all kids were minors, in a fair, wise and proper way? Would every area of their lives be well cared for – emotional, psychological, physical? Is there any establishment in place now that handles this fully?

Some would say there are insurance companies and all, but besides financial re-imbursement to the next of kin, are they saddled with the responsibility of somewhat filling that parent’s shoes especially when there is no worthy family member to take charge?

Then I discussed this at small meeting and I came out with the understanding that there are certain things you need to pass on to your young ones/put in place now so as to keep your mind at rest. So that come what may, when they take the baton from you at the time you pass it on, they would run their race even better than you did yours.

Firstly is the finance bit. This cannot be underestimated - Savings, investments and property. Never assume any sum is too small to set aside. Little drops make an ocean. Be diligent, be consistent. Along with this, is letting your spouse, lawyer or trusted friend/family in on whatever is in place for them. An uncle once told me when I marketed a company’s shares to him that, he would rather focus on property, since his kids could sue tenants for non-payment of rent and not the management of a company for non-payment of dividends. Different schools of thoughts but I got something from his counsel.

Secondly, you must imbibe the right values in them. The first may be a tough call for some but this one costs only time and conscious effort. If they can’t stand for something, they’ll fall for anything. Let your kids know what you stand for. Let them also know those values would make them outstanding, with or without you. Values like integrity, loyalty, excellence, humility, fairness etc are being used in companies now so everyone is functioning with the same mindset to sustain the business and its brand, how much more a lineage?

Thirdly, the ability to make something out of nothing or increase whatever comes into their hands. This would help them turn those lemons life offers them to lemonade. It would also enable them appreciate their small beginnings ad maximize the little they have in hand for greater things.

Lastly, but definitely not the least is faith & hope in God. This assures them someone greater than man is on their side. It would let them know come what may, the best is yet to come and will surely come.

So as we pray for long life, let’s remember, life is a relay as we pass the baton on to the generations after. Know the colour of your baton and let them know what colour they are looking out for to run with when it’s their turn.

What you’re looking for...

Some while ago I asked the young lady staying with me to look for a particular napkin that we used mostly for my baby, or well, he’s more of a toddler now. I gave her the colour to remind her and left her to the search while I did something else. Minutes passed and then I checked on her, and was somewhat taken aback that she was yet to locate it. And then it actually dawned on me, does she know what she is looking for, so I had to ask her, “Do you know what you are looking for?”

While I pondered over this later that morning it struck me that the same problem affects us all in life. Do we really know what it is we are looking for? Truth is, knowing exactly what you’re looking for prevents you from missing it when it comes your way and to know exactly where to get it.

Taking you back to the napkin search for instance, if this young lady had remembered the exact napkin, she’ll recall it had been washed, ironed and kept. The challenge would now be to know where it wouldn’t have been kept and search the more likely places first. But as it were, she was checking anywhere possible for something that may match what I needed.

In relationships for instance, particularly one that could lead to marriage, my counsel had always been to know the kind of spouse you want. Many say it’s not nice to be too rigid, but truth is, if you can’t stand for your choice and wait for it, you’ll probably settle for anyone. Before I met my husband, I had a list of the must have’s for instance (maybe what many ladies would want though), God fearing, God loving, Intelligent, Caring and yeah with a good sense of humour. With God’s favour, when he came by, I knew it. The same would go for a job, an opportunity to bless, even material things like houses, cars et al.

If you don’t want to miss that thing when it comes, if you want to be able to sift through the available options quickly, if you want to know where you can start your search, then take time out to itemize the description or quality of what you’re looking for. You may need to even prioritize the list where applicable and probably ask around from valid sources (for me this includes God often), and on many occasions I have found what I was looking for. Taking this back to you…What are you looking for?

1st Anniversary + Straight From Les

It’s exactly a year and a day after FOOTSTEPS was launched. The anniversary coincides with my birthday. Now whenever I celebrate an additional year of my existence yearly, I can look at my articles and see what I’ve learnt, how much I’ve changed and how I have been a blessing to others. My birthday was yesterday and reflecting back, I felt more fulfilled despite having a number of things in the pipeline than some previous years.

I committed to sharing points I noted down from the last MTN innovation day where Les Brown featured as the guest/motivational speaker. Looking back I must confess it could have been only God who wanted me there, considering the fact that the urge to attend came that Friday morning. I registered for myself and some friends, but out of the 4 of us who wanted to be there I was the only one privileged to make it in eventually. I would therefore attempt to share now and probably in subsequent posts, those memoirs I picked at the meeting.

Thoughts become things

The starting point or drawing table of all we see now and even experience was a thought in our minds or the mind of someone else. So if you want something to happen or to be, then start to think about it and keep thinking about it. And in good time, it would materialize. The reverse is same, if you’re not interested in something, take it out of your thoughts before it comes to be.

You attract what you think of most

Still on thoughts, that which you attract – people, situations - is what you think of or brood over the most. For what we have so far is what we have attracted. If you’re wondering why certain people seem to surround you often or certain situations persist, you need to review first your highly placed thoughts, even the subconscious ones, and then make changes from there.

Focus on what you want not what you don’t want

I also learnt this from the Bible and “The Secret”. Focus rather on the positive side of something than the negative. For instance, the glass as half full than half empty; your early morning rush goal as –“ I need to make it in early” rather than “I don’t want to be late”; you health condition as, “I need to be better or healed” instead of “I am weak”. A good consolation is also in the fact that a positive thought is 100 times more powerful than a negative, so you can imagine the magnitude of results achievable with the right focus.

Though few, the points above can make significant difference in our lives if practised. I’ll stop here for now, with more in the sequel to this post but also challenge you to begin to think, think right and focus right.

Sacrifice then Ceremony

I'm not too glad about letting the month of March pass without posting another article, I really wanted to but just didn’t get to make that time out to. However, I will consciously work on that.

About two months ago, I was at the peak of preparing for the final diet of my professional exams, that was when this learning, or discovery more like it, dawned on me. It was actually a challenging phase. Let me simply call it “sacrifice” because truly I did lay down a lot of preferences just to re-prioritize and work towards the final lap well.

It was at this phase that every second in transit to places counted, because I was running with set goals to cover as many chapters as I could in my study pack. On the way to work, on the way from, in the vehicle, as long as it was well lit, I was studying. Weekends, were another level, I woke up early enough to study in the wee hours before the house was bustling with life especially my kids, when everyone took time to chill watching TV, I had to separate myself to study even more. The last few days off work just before the exam was something else, my time table wa 2/3 hours study periods covering about 7-9 hours per day from 6.30am, with 2/3 hours break in between the periods. I sacrificed. I got novels, magazines and motivational books, which I couldn’t read. I heard about movies from JENIFA to Slumdog Millionaire but couldn’t go near.

All the same, I encouraged myself with these words of comfort, this phase will pass, and then I will celebrate and there’ll be a ceremony - of liberty and especially success. And surely after the final paper that Saturday afternoon, I celebrated. I went with my dad and daughter to watch Bolt at the cinema.

Then I looked into other areas of life, for you to really enjoy a ceremony, some sacrifice would have been made, e.g. preparing for a degree exam to be better qualified and have good chances to earn more, preparing for a wedding to tie the knot with that loved one, starting your business to generate more income, preparing your child every morning for school to become educated, exercising to lose some weight and be in shape, even if it as little as getting yourself to a ceremony venue. Some sacrifice, then ceremeony.

My final word then is this, do you feel so pressed at this time, not enjoying what you’d have loved to, pushing yourself the extra mile to get that dream fulfilled, then be encouraged, not long from this sacrifice stage, your ceremony cometh.